God is good

Today is one of those days that I am overwhelmed by the goodness of God. I am overwhelmed at the blessings he gives me, and how kind he is towards me and my family.

Sometimes I have a hard time accepting all that he has given to me, sometimes I think, "but why?" Why am I so fortunate and lucky and blessed? Why have I been given so much, when others have so little?

I read a story about a wonderful RM who was in a car accident. He went into a coma for about a month. He finally came out of it but he has to re-learn EVERYTHING. Walking, talking, breathing. As I read the story I couldn't help but get tears in my eyes. Why was this young man given this trial, when I am so blessed to have a physical and capable body without limitations?

Then I thought to some people I know, they are in their twenties but have gotten married in the temple, then divorced. Why did they have spouses who chose different paths? Why am I given the most amazing man in the world to be my husband?

I kept thinking, why do I have an amazing job? Why do I have a wonderful family who was able to put me through college? Why do I have a car, a home, food to eat, clothes to wear?

I'm no better than anyone else, why have I been given so much?

Then I remembered some scriptures that touched my heart:

“For verily I say unto you, blessed is he that keepeth my commandments, whether in life or in death; and he that is faithful in tribulation, the reward of the same is greater in the kingdom of heaven.

“Ye cannot behold with your natural eyes, for the present time, the design of your God concerning those things which shall … follow after much tribulation.

“For after much tribulation come the blessings” (D&C 58:2–4).

Everyone has trials, and everyone's trials are different.

God has blessed me with more than I can ever thank him for. But that doesn't mean I won't have trials. In the foreseeable future I can see medical school being a trial. So maybe that is a trial that is tailor made for Chad and I. Where someone who is out of work, that trial is tailor made for them.

God knows us more personally and intimately than we know ourselves. That means he knows how to bless us, and how to try us. In the times of blessing I need to be grateful for all I've been given. In times of trial I need to also remember all I've been given.

First Date

This weekend was really great with my Chadicous. No we didn't do anything crazy amazing. But there were some moments we had together that were priceless to me.

Friday was a stressful day for me. That husband of mine gave me a back massage and let me drift off to sleep early.

Saturday was a nightmare. That husband of mine picked me up from the ground where I sat crying and carried me over to the bed. Where he cuddled and kissed me. And asked about my feelings and really cared. That same night I was washing dishes when I heard music coming from our living room ... piano music. It was Chad playing the piano. I can't think of any better thing than listening to him play the piano. It was soothing. He let me pick out some songs for him to play. One of which was "Come What May" yes, from Moulin Rouge. Hearing him play it on the piano was even better than the movie. I had so much emotion tied to him playing that song. I felt, overwhelmed. It was a really intimate moment for me, one that he created without knowing. I felt connected to my husband and I wished he would just play that song all night with me sitting there staring at his hands gracefully moving over the keys.

Then he was my hero and played "The Cave" by Mumford and Sons. My heart literally soared the entire time he was playing it. He doesn't like Mumford, but he has no idea that him playing made my entire day. He then kissed me on the forehead. That wonderful hour of him playing is one of my fondest moments to date.

Sunday I made waffles for breakfast and we went to church. Afterward we drove the Alpine Loop. One year ago we drove the same Alpine Loop for our first date. How charming life is to be with him in the same car one year later with a ring on my finger. On our first date I didn't even think about if we would get married. All I knew was I wanted to be with him. And now I am. One year later from our first date, I'm his wife.

How lucky am I?



P.S. To see how Chad's interview went check out his med school update page.